Sailing

*This was from Labor Day 2011 when I was pregnant with Gemma. Somehow it got lost in the draft box {...with 48 of its friends...I'm so bad at blogging}.

Last Monday {Labor Day}, Luke and I thought it would be fun to rent a boat and spend some time on the lake in our neighborhood.  As we were approaching the rental stand--beach clothes on, picnic and towels in hand--Luke said, "If there's enough wind, we will get a sailboat; otherwise, we'll just get a paddle boat."  Because what fun would sailing be without any wind, right?  Right??

After speaking with the boy renting out the boats, Luke decided to go with the sailboat, which I was excited about.  I have enjoyed sailing the few times we have gone before, and with Augustine on deck, a paddle boat seemed like a lot of work.

So, off we went.  Augustine and I munched on our lunch, while Luke attempted to eat his sandwich--as he steered with one hand and magically balanced our boat across the water with the other by pulling and releasing a rope.  For those who haven't been sailing {with an amateur}, it requires a fair amount of concentration and focus.  I had to spoon fed Luke his pasta salad and take over the steering ever-so-briefly while he popped open his bottle of hard cider, but before we knew it a half an hour had passed and we were uneventfully on the other side of the lake.

That's where the trouble started.

In an effort to go perpendicular from where we had come, Luke maneuvered the rope and steering rod over and over again...but each time we could only get so far before having to catch the wind going the other way, resulting in our little boat doing circles for about 30 minutes.  At that point, Luke gave up on venturing into that part of the lake and we started heading back to shore. 

Up to this point, none of us felt like our lives or livelihood or good humor had been threatened.

Now is probably a good time to mention that Augustine started the boat ride wearing a t-shirt, diaper, and swimsuit, but after a few false "potty" alarms, in which I took off everything below his waist and held him over the side of our moving sailboat to do his business, we decided to leave him naked for awhile.  BUT awhile after that, we couldn't believe that he still hadn't peed, so we put his diaper back on just to be safe. 

Sure enough, only minutes later, I reach down to feel his diaper, and the warm sensation tells me that he has just peed {we are in the midst of potty training}.  "O'well," I think, "we are on a boat, so it's not like he could have gone on the potty anyway." 

So, here we are, on the opposite end of the lake from where we started, trying to get back to the dock.  I figured 30 minutes out, almost 30 minutes going in circles, and now 30 minutes back.  Ain't no thing. 

But it didn't turn out that way.  In fact it took us two hours, nearly capsizing on several occasions, Luke peeing in his empty cider bottle while sailing through rough waters, me nursing Augustine through the worst of the waves, a light rain, and some threats on my part to get back. 

Let's just say there was definitely enough wind!  

And what ever happened to Augustine and his diaper?  Well, like I said earlier, I knew he peed in his diaper, but then he was squatting down in the boat to play in the water that spilled over the edge of the boat when we nearly tipped {more than once}, making his diaper soggy and inflated.  At some point Luke noticed and said, "Augustine's diaper looks really wet!"  "Yeah, he sat in some water and made it balloon," I said, while flippantly reaching over with one hand to take it off for his comfort.  And, let me just tell you, there was a lot more than pee and pond water in that diaper...and now it was all over my arm!  By the time we got back, we all needed a shower...and I needed therapy.

*Day 3 of the 7 day blogging challenge down.